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User blog:Softest Boi/Gavin's Fanon Sins - Vacation: Episode 1
Bold text indicates it is a comment of mine. Let's begin: It was the big day. 12 of the site's members were going to meeting each other in person in Florida, and they'd be staying in a fancy hotel for two weeks. They had went through many obstacles; starting a Kickstarter supposedly for orphans so they could pay for the trip, and managed to convince their parents they were just going on a school trip, honest. Why only twelve members? Were any other members who wanted to join declined from going? Did only twelve members want to go? Not to mention, with how young some of the members were when this was written, I doubt their parents would take it that they were going on a school trip for two weeks to another state, another country, and even another contintent. +6 sins. They all had their different ways of getting there; William went on a private jet, Ponyo skydived out of a plane as it was passing Mexico, Jellyfish drove a flying car with a "STAY OFF THE SAUCE" design, etc. Eventually, everyone got there, and met each other in person for the first time. William was only twelve when this was written. How does a twelve year old get a private jet? As far as I know, William is not from a rich family. Also, Jelly drove a flying car? Seriously? Though Ponyo's method sounds kinda fun, but still. +12 sins. "Um...hi, everyone." Ponyo said. "Hey, sexy." Lazaro said. Ponyo cringed. Lazaro was just as perverted in real life as he was online. I cringe at perveted characters too. +1 sin. "Uh, hi." This guy you met on the internet calls you "sexy" and you act as if "sexy" is a normal way to address who is not your partner? +1 sin. "Hey, Ponyo." Jellyfish said, opening his suitcase full of Limp Bizkit and Offspring CDs. "This should take care of our music for two weeks." Music for everyone or just you two (possibly more)? +1 sin. "Hey, Simon." Da Nerd said. "H-asterisk-c-k." "Uh, what?" Simon asked. "H-asterisk-c-k." "Yeah, that doesn't really work in real life." "Damn." How does he forgot the real life is not the internet? Also, why did he even say it to start with? +2 sins. "Hey, Da Nerd." Topher said. "Hey, Toph." Da Nerd replied back. So, basically everyone introduced themselves to everyone, which was long and drawn out and not worth reading, so I'm ust gonna skip ahead. "ust"? +1 sin. "So..." Ponyo started. "...you guys wanna order room service?" "Sure." Lazaro said. "Does it come with a condom?" That was beyond cringey. +2 sins. "Shut up." Ponyo said, hitting him on the arm. "Can we get pizza?" Topher asked. "Hold on, let me check out the price." Ponyo said, flipping through the menu. Her eyes practically fell out of her head. "Holy shit! $22 for a plain pepperoni pizza? Ain't nobody got time for that." Ponyo closed the book, leaving a little note inside for the next person who stays in this room; Room service is a ripoff. Don't waste your time. -Anonymous "Well, if you guys want pizza, Domino's probs delivers here." Ponyo said, taking out her laptop and going to the Domino's website. "What do all you guys want?" You can't say "probably" You just say "probs"? I might be nitpicking a little, but still. +1 sin. The screams started. "PEPPERONI PIZZA!" "BONELESS CHICKEN!" "HOT WINGS!" "OVEN BAKED SANDWICH!" "STUFFED CHEESY BREAD!" "PENIS PIZZA!" The sex jokes are overly cringey. I like sex jokes, but just saying "penis" out of nowhere isn't funny. +2 sins. Ponyo turned to Lazaro, who was clearly the only person who could've said the last one. "That's not a real pizza." "It should be." Lazaro replied. No, it should not. +1 sin. So Ponyo spent $300 of the Kickstarter money ($500,000 goal by the way - it totally worked, suckers!) so everyone could stuff their faces with whatever their hearts desired. "So, guys, what do you wanna do tomorrow?" Ponyo asked. "We could check out that interactive museum downto-" Ponyo stopped her sentence when she realized that everyone was comatose. It must've been a long ride to get here, so she understood they all needed their rest. One thing she did notice is that Da Nerd fell asleep on top of Simon. Ponyo giggled and took a picture with her camera. They're just sleeping. Comatose is basically when someone is in a coma. +1 sin. Lazaro snuck up behind her - apparently, not everyone was asleep - and began kissing her. Ponyo jumped. I thought everyone else was asleep? +1 sin. "So, are you ready?" Lazaro asked. Why does he think Ponyo is into him? +2 sins. "Listen, Lazaro..." Ponyo started. "...I just don't know if I'm ready to have sex with you in real life." "Come on, it's not that much different from the Internet." "Except for the STDs and AIDS and stuff like that." Except in real life, the sex actually happens. Also, sexual intercourse does not always lead to STDs. +3 sins. Lazaro frowned. "Oh. I see." Ponyo smiled. "Don't be like that. Look, we've got two weeks; if you can get a condom in two weeks, sure, I'm all for it." CONDOMS! Lazaro thought. How could be so stupid as to have forgot condoms? You just buy some. +1 sin. "Alright." Lazaro said, heading off to sleep. Ponyo also head off to sleep, but not before reading the latest issue of Junjo Romantica with her reading light she had brought. I like anime and manga, and if I could get any issues of a manga I liked (e.g Attack on Titan), I'd do the same thing, so I'll remove a sin. -1 sin. Total of sins: 37. Punishment: No condoms for two weeks. Category:Blog posts